I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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