I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
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