You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
did i walk over a car last night?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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