I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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