biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
