Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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