That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Randomize
