Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
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