Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
