What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
