he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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