Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
