So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
