So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
