All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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