if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
