I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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