A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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