She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
bring money and cleavage
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
