Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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