is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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