Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
