Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
