you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
