I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
