why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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