i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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