I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
honey bunches of taint.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
