i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize