a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
