Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
