lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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