McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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