I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
foreskin is a definite game changer
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
