are you so shy because you have an std?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Randomize
