the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
