Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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