Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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