Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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