Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
