matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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