I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
