well you can't waste a boner
I want you more than these girls want KFC
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
