Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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