Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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