Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
