So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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