Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
