Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
