I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
