Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
